Brianna Kehrer

11:11

When he left I ate the entire pint of dairy-free ice cream he neglected in my freezer. I immediately regretted it because it was all that remained.

When he left I didn’t shower for seven straight days. I called into work. I told them a dear friend was dying. Little did they know that dear friend was my soul.

When he left I started eating meat again. Not because I craved it, but because I needed to taste a suffering other than my own.
When he left Roy G Biv turned to fifty shades of gray.

When he left I slept for twenty-two consecutive hours on purpose, because the horror of my reality was far worse than any nightmare my subconscious could muster up.

When he left so did my ability to formulate a thought that didn’t scream “inadequate reject” over and over and over like a relentless alarm clock after a weekend of psychedelics

When he left I filled the blank notebook he bought me with all the words I could never say to him

When he left I ate 2000 calories in 8 days.

When he left I unfollowed him on social media, archived all of our messages, and changed his name in my phone from “soulmate” to “DO NOT ANSWER.” I answered anyway.

 


Brianna KehrerBrianna Kehrer is a 518 native who has been writing poetry for 20 years. She received a Bachelor’s Degree in English from the University at Albany. Mother to an aspiring superhero, Brianna has devoted her life’s work to helping the less fortunate by working and volunteering for several nonprofit organizations in the capital region.